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Upper Limit Dads

By: Matt Woodrum – Founder of Wrestling with Fatherhood The upper limit challenge is one of the biggest problems that faces men today. The upper limit challenge places a glass ceiling above you so that you cannot accomplish your dreams with your personal life, your wife, and your children. The upper limit challenge is important to understand because it can help you to push past that glass ceiling that is holding you down. The upper limit ceiling comes from a number of different factors including: 1.         Growing up with absent parents physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. 2.         Going through physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual abuse by a loved one. 3.         Being neglected by people who are supposed to care about you. 4.         People who have told you your entire life that you are not good enough. All of these things place a glass ceiling above you in between you and your potential. One of the biggest struggles with fatherhood is that if you grew up without a great dad or role model, it is difficult to find a great example of what a dad or a role model should be. Whenever someone turns on the TV, they are flooded with horrible examples of how to treat your wife and/or your children. […]

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The Fatherhood Blueprint

By: Matt Woodrum – Founder of Wrestling with Fatherhood One of the most difficult things about fatherhood is that there is not a Manuel that telling us what to do or not to do that also tells us the impact that our actions will have on our children.  This makes it difficult, as a dad, to be the best dad possible since we do not want to harm our children.  We cannot instantly see how correcting our children will make that difference.  Will our sons have anger issues if I get made at them for something they do?  Will I drive my daughter away from the family because I told her to put more clothes on?  How will these decisions effect my children’s lives and their relationship with their parents.  There are typically two different ways that fathers parent their own children.  We parent based on our feelings and how our own parents treated us. One of the biggest down falls is that we parent based off of what our feelings are.  This can be dangerous for a number of different reasons.  The biggest reason is that our feelings can change from day to day.  One day we might have a great day at work, while the next day may be […]

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Simple Gifts for Moms

By: Terry Burgess, America’s Mid-life Coach for Men with Upward MC This coming Sunday, May 13, 2018, is Mothers Day.  It is a day designated so we can celebrate and recognize all mothers for their endless love, nurturing, childbearing, parenting and contributions to our families. As a man especially one who has lost his mother as well as both my grandmothers this day still holds a very important meaning to me.   This is because I now see how important it is to let each mother know the very important and often not recognized role they play in the family. It is now for this one reason I make sure that my step-children don’t forget about their mother and grandmothers on this special day.   However, each year when I ask them what they want to do for their mother and grandmother they respond with “IDK” when I text. This year I suggested to them what I learned later in my life when I my mother and grandparents were living.  I used to buy presents for my mom prior to my father’s death in 1974.   However, after that I only got a card for mom which was usually bought by my grandmother.  We also had a special meal.   However, as I grew […]

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The Choice is Yours!

By: Matt Woodrum – Founder of Wrestling with Fatherhood 88% of men and women who are currently serving time in prison, grow up without a dad and yet each and everyday men everywhere walk by their children without thinking they hold value within their children’s lives.  This usually happens for a couple of reasons. We do not believe that we are good enough to speak into our children’s lives because of how the media (TV, movies, music, and other entertainment) has painted us. We also have the false belief that our wives are better fitted to take care of the family. We grow up without dads ourselves and do not know how to be a good dad to our own children When we look at the above reasons for under valuing ourselves in the family, we can see that men have started to believe that lie that men are not needed within the family.  This could not be further from the truth.  When we (men) stop believing the lie that we hold no value within the family, we can do some amazing things.  When fathers are in the home, some amazing things happen. Boys/men When boys/men understand that they are strong, valuable, have goals & dreams that they can accomplish, […]

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The Power of Walking the Talk!

By: Terry Burgess, America’s Mid-life Coach for Men with Upward MC First off, please let me apologize for the virtually dropping off the face of the internet for the past 3 weeks.   I did not do it with the intention of forgetting you my friends, followers, and supporters. However, I did step back because I was walking and acting out my mantra that I discussed in a previous blog.   This mantra God First! Family Second, and Everything Else Third! – Take care of the first two and the third will take care of itself!” The past three weeks have been very challenging for my immediate family.  Serious health issues with my in-laws which has required the attention of my wife, myself and my two stepchildren, academic challenges my two stepchildren have had in their schooling, as well as health issues with my wife and now me.  Honestly, there have been times we have been seeing each other passing and going because of trying to take care of each other and our responsibilities to others. I had to do some serious juggling to help make everything work.  I am not perfect at doing things on the fly and as I say, “by the seat of my pants”.  However, the past three […]

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Take the SPACE to Reset your Goals

By: Teresa McCloy,  CEO and Creator of the REALIFE Process™ Knowing what to do when a goal doesn’t develop as you had planned is important so as not to get stuck in a cycle of incomplete goals. Here are 4 steps using the acronym SPACE to reset your goals. Step one is to step away and recognize that not achieving your goal does not mean that you have failed. It just means that something needs adjusted in the strategies. Step Away from the project for a few days and give space to clear your head. Step 2 is pray to seek clarity. Faith will bring connection to deeper dreams and desires so you can begin to evaluate what isn’t working. Time in solitude and listening helps to see both the things that didn’t work, but also the things that did.  Step 3 is to ask questions. The best way to handle a setback is to ask honest questions that will help identify the problems. Meeting with a coach or accountability partner to discuss the project is also a great place to process questions and see where you might be stuck. With better clarity, and connection to deeper desire and processing through what wasn’t successful, you can move to step 4 which is […]

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Blocking Time for Productivity

By: Teresa McCloy,  CEO and Creator of the REALIFE Process™ Setting up a calendar for maximum productivity can best be done through using time blocks.  Time Blocking is somewhat the same as setting up a budget for money.  Looking at the calendar and deciding in advance how the time will be spent is similar to planning how to spend an allotted amount of money.  One thing to be aware of with time blocking is to not blocking time just  for work projects but for other things that matter as well. Again, just as the checkbook indicates where our values lie so, also, does how we spend time. Here are four areas to block out in your calendar each week. Project Blocks are 90–120-minute blocks of time where you’re especially creative, inspired, and able to do high-level work that requires focus on your Projects. Schedule 4-5 of these blocks each week. Prep Blocks are 30–60-minute lower-energy blocks of time where you’re not in the zone to do the work that requires deeper focus, but there are still other types of work you can do effectively. Examples of these would be email management, calendar management, return phone calls, and social media. Schedule 2-3 of these blocks each day. People Blocks are 60-90-minute blocks of […]

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PICKLES IN THE JAR

By: Teresa McCloy,  CEO and Creator of the REALIFE Process™ Living on a grain farm in southern Illinois, we grow cucumbers in our garden and make delicious sweet pickles every summer. These pickles take 14 days to prepare.  For the first several days the sliced cucumbers sit in a brine of salt water so they become soft and clear and then are mixed together with so many cups of sugar that it seems a recipe for making candy.  Lots of vinegar and spices are heated together and poured over the cucumbers. Each day the juice is drained, heated and poured over the pickles, and each day the smell of the delicious pickles begins to come to life much like pickled candy. Now it’s time to get them in the jar.  What looks like the easiest thing to do is pour the juice in the jar and then put the pickles in, but that doesn’t always work.  The mixture of pickles and juice just doesn’t fit in the jar. It becomes necessary to take the time to put each pickle slice in by hand, the big ones first and then the smaller ones to get the most slices in the wide mouth jar. Then pour the juice in and around the pickle slices. […]

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Stop Being Productive and Do What Matters

By: Teresa McCloy,  CEO and Creator of the REALIFE Process™ Society talks a lot these days about being productive.  It’s one of the great buzz words.  We are good at it, or so we think. Making our lists of things to do and checking them off is the mark of a truly productive person. What if that list of things to do really isn’t a list of things that matter to you?  What if that list looks like someone else’s life and not yours?  Or at least not the list of things you are passionate about.  To change the list, we should stop, press pause and take a deeper look at what we are doing and why? We must allow time to step off the crazy cycle and reconnect to our deeper dreams and desires. Make a new list of what matters such as faith, family, friendships and generosity. All that sounds great! We know it in our minds, but when we look at our calendars and to do lists, are those the things that are showing up? Our calendars and our checkbook tell the true story of our lives. Being intentional with these deeper things that matter is living the life we desire, not the life that puts out fires. […]

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Dr. King’s Lasting Legacy for All Mankind

By: Terry Burgess, America’s Mid-life Coach for Men with Upward MC Today is the 50th anniversary the assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. at the Lorraine Hotel in Memphis.   Dr. King is one of the most dynamic leaders our World has ever known.   He was the successful leader of a peaceful movement to protest a very volatile societal issue at the time of his death.  There are several lessons and traits we could learn from his life which can transform our lives with an abundance everyday success. The foremost trait I believe Dr. King possessed is that of having a singular and definitive purpose and mission.   Dr. King best described his purpose and mission in his famous “I Have A Dream” speech.  However, Dr. King took this a step further by reinforcing the message by walking the speech in his actions everyday of his life. I believe if each of us can find our definitive purpose and mission take the steps to reinforce the message not only in our words but our actions everyday we can make our dreams come true.   When we do that we can truly change our world and leave a lasting legacy just as Dr. King did in his death in 1968. Please feel free […]

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