By: Terry Burgess, Owner and Men’s Midlife Coach, Upward MC
Your spending habits can tell a lot about your state of mind and maturity levels. I discovered this during my growth of dealing with the challenges of my midlife crisis. I discovered during this period of maturity; I changed my need to obtain stuff into the need of creating and cherishing relationships and experiences.
Physical items and things purchased were more important to me during my twentysomething and thirtysomething years. It during that period of my life I thought there was a direct correlation between the acquisition of stuff and happiness.
When I was 20 years old, I got my first credit card and purchased a Pioneer Stereo rack system. I thought I was going to be happy because I had “big stereo and speakers” to play my music I loved. Yes, I felt happy for a short period of time, but I soon had to find another item to have to be happy again. This continued time after time. It happened so much that I had to claim bankruptcy by the time I turned 29 because of all the credit card debt. I also had collected a lot of “stuff” that did not mean much to me other than having to find places to keep it.
I discovered midway through my thirtysomething years that happiness could not be bought. I started to realize that true happiness is something that does not have an exact amount price tag on it. True happiness comes from something that is priceless. This happiness is from cherishing friendships, relationships, and life’s experiences. Yes, there is some financial investment in these items. However, they repay you in a currency of memories and gifts that cannot just be tossed in a closet or storage unit to be unused or needed.
It was shortly during this discovery that I began my midlife crisis journey. This lesson was just strengthened during those years. When I began to rebuild my life as it fell all around me, I discarded a lot of physical stuff. The items I kept were sentimental such as pictures, handwritten letters from my loved ones, and videos of experiences in my life.
Today, I could care less if I had the latest and newest computer, tv, or “cool item of the month”. I have found I would rather invest my money in making experiences such as hearing stories of my wife taking our daughter to her first New Kids on the Block concert. The joy I got from that experience I get returned to me at least once a month because my daughter and her now share this experience and shared it with me because I helped make it happened.
So, I strongly urge you to look at how you value your money and where you invest it. Is it in physical stuff or is it in developing memories and experiences.
If you are needing help or discernment on where to go next in your midlife journey. Please feel free to contact me for a complimentary 1-hour coaching session. I can help you develop a simple starting point plan to help you get on the road from your “midlife crisis” to your “midlife rediscovery and redesign” for your life. You can visit http://bit.ly/SchedulewithTerry to schedule you complimentary coaching hour!
Terry is a Personal Leadership and Midlife Coach for Men with Upward MC in Benton, Kentucky. He can be contacted via e-mail at Terry@upwardmc.com or by phone at 270-493-0967. His website can be found at http://www.terrypburgess.com